Lesbian Counselling

A word from my clients

My clients kindly agreed to tell you a bit about their own experiences. What follows has been written by them, with names changed for confidentiality.


EMILY

Two years after a relationship break up, I still couldn’t allow myself to let go of the hurt or get past the anger. Eventually I decided that I needed some help, because I wasn’t really living - all I was doing was dragging myself from one day to the next.

I was skeptical about counselling, but I hadn’t been able to change my life by myself and I couldn’t think of any other way forward. I was scared that a counsellor would see right through me, and probe into areas that I didn't want to look at. Right from the start, though, Fiona was supportive, caring, non-judgemental. She gave me a safe space in which I could go wherever I wanted to go.

We explored my relationships, unravelling why I made certain choices. In my own time I began to learn more about myself and to let go of the old, negative patterns that had stunted me, not just in my relationship but all through my life.

Working with Fiona is challenging, even painful at times, but there was an immense sense of relief and freedom as I slowly began to have some insight into my behaviour, to change my outlook and to like myself a little.

Counselling has enabled me to gain perspective, to improve my self-esteem and look forward to a future in which I won’t keep making the same mistakes.

Most of all counselling has made a huge difference to my relationships. For the first time in my life I have a partner with whom I have a truly equal, adult, honest and loving relationship. Janey believes that our relationship would never have got off the ground if I hadn’t been supported by Fiona. And she says that indirectly Fiona has helped her too – like most people Janey has a complex past but it is something we can talk about, share and accept.

I have also learned so much about my relationships with my own family and I’ve been able to make small shifts in the dynamics between us to create something that’s brought us all closer than we have ever been.

It has been a long process, but wherever I have been Fiona has been there with me. I still have a lot to think about, but now I am rarely troubled by the extreme and crippling emotional responses I had in the past. Working with Fiona is the best thing I’ve ever done.




MARY

Walking alone, holding painful secrets close, although tremendously hard, was a breeze in comparison to opening my heart and mind to a stranger, known only as a name in an advert and then a voice at the end of the phone line.

Looking back to that place of darkness, I often wonder how long I would have survived without help.

Walking that path to my first meeting with Fiona was an invaluable start to a road of healing and light from the fear and darkness I had found myself in.

This road of recovery has often been rocky. I often felt like quitting, but with the reliable ongoing patience and experience of a source who has taught me to see the sun in the darkness and the beauty in a somewhat cracked mirror, it has been the "fixing" of my broken past.

I stand with the sun shining as I walk my onward path.



The Mask
by Mary


I wonder why the mask feels so comfortable,
how it comes to fit so snug.
It’s a place of safe-keeping. To hide, to store
a multitude of thoughts and feelings that fit behind.

The sound of laughter floods my ears, just enough to hide my tears.
Conversations roll. Oh, so perfect: no-one can tell
it’s just another act.
A song of happiness paints the brightest colours:
a perfect portrayal of beauty.

Take the dark and turn it bright.
Make the rain clouds swell with light.
Pull the scary shadows out to dance
For who can tell, and who can say,
What secrets hide away.

The mask is high.
The mask is wide.
The mask is deep.
The mask is silent: a voice that never speaks.